Safety Issues

Safety is of paramount importance when partaking in BDSM activities. Not only do you need to take care of the person/people you are playing with, but also you need to protect yourself. We will include whatever information we can glean here to try and help you play as safely as possible. However, the final responsibility for any safety has to rest with the individual. It is your call; this is, at best, good advice.

A major philosophy within BDSM in general, is that what we do (often referred to as "WIITWD", meaning "what it is that we do") should be safe, sane and consensual, so it makes sense to divide our advice into these headings:

Safe

OK, so you may want your lover to hurt you, but it’s always best to avoid lasting physical damage. We have some tips here for physical/medical safety relating to various kinks, and pointers to advice on safer sex and sexual anatomy (not specific to BDSM). Wherever we are unable to provide advice, we’re trying to find others to can. More to come...

Sane

Of course it’s not just your physical or medical well-being you’ll want to look after, but emotional and psychological. Regardless of what kind of relationship you want or have, and regardless of how new you are to these activities, odds are you won’t want anyone to take advantage of you. We can suggest a few things to think about so that you’ll know what you’re letting yourself in for.More to come...

Consensual

As far as we’re concerned, anything safe and sane is OK, as long as both people want it. Regardless of whether the person you’re playing with is your wife or a stranger, you need to be able to communicate what your limits are and when you’ve reached them. Some people do this with "safewords" - but then, some people make things more complex by giving up all rights to a safeword when they commit to their Master or Mistress. More to come...

Look after yourselves, and have fun!